Monthly Archive

This year I joined the quarter-centenarian club with my fellow 1990 babies. I admit that I stumbled through the early years of adulthood rather haphazardly without a clue about who I was or what I wanted to pursue in life. As I reflect on the last few years I spent experimenting with, and often times failing at the art of “adult’ing”, I realized that my preconception about transforming into someone who has it all figured out is a lie. Although I still have much to learn, life has taught me a few lessons that I may never forget (in no particular order):

• On negativity: At some point, someone will tell you that you are not good enough, you’re not a good fit, you’re not my type, you can’t, etc. DO think about feedback carefully, but DO NOT allow a trivial opinion discourage you from chasing your dreams. Revel in your personal wins, and disregard comments that simply aren’t true.

• On friendship: On that note, surround yourself with good friends who are positive and supportive as this will affect the quality of your life and happiness. Tell your loved ones how much you love and care about them, and always make time for those who matter. Fight constructively and forgive often. Life is too short – you can always make more money, but people will not be around forever.

• On communication: Say what you mean and mean what you say. Stand up for yourself and learn how to say no. Authenticity is just too rare these days.

• On failure: Failure is nothing to be afraid of. As my pal likes to remind me, the sun will rise again tomorrow and you will have another chance to try again. Take risks, learn from your mistakes, lather, rinse, repeat.

• On finances: Save, invest, and live below your means. Status symbols are worthless; build real wealth instead because compound interest is a real thing. This means pay off debt, cook meals at home, pay as little rent as possible, wait for sales, understand need vs. want, and don’t bother with the Joneses (to add to note on friendship – real friends don’t treat you differently because of what you have.)

• On happiness: Practice gratitude every day. It’s human nature to continually strive for the next best thing, so it’s easy to become blinded by the have-nots. Appreciate the roof over your head, the food on the table, and the breath you just took because as you are reading this someone else just took their last.

• On health: You get one body so take care of it. Life is difficult to enjoy or can get cut short when you are sick. Eat veggies, drink water, get enough sleep, and keep moving. This is not something you can throw money at and hope it goes away.

• On perspective: Always have a sense of humor. Life is full of ups and downs, so just accept the facts and enjoy the journey! Trust me – in the grand scheme of things, your problems are probably not a big deal. Learn to laugh at yourself.

• On introspection: Know who you are and what matters to you. Now make sure your actions align with your values. This is called acting with integrity. This is the key to happiness, confidence, and learning to love yourself.

• On learning: Learning doesn’t stop after graduation. Life is not about figuring it all out. A life learner is relentless in the pursuit of self-improvement and finding the discipline to push through struggles in a valiant effort to become the best at anything. Keep challenging yourself. There is always room to grow.